Pain and suffering, though not really

As a 21-year-old in a developed country, I do not know much about pain and suffering. The bouts of pain and relative suffering I feel are either self-inflicted via sports and recreation or work of some kind or is due to illness or injury. Being in nursing school and working in the ED has made me acutely aware of my mortality and how lucky I am to be alive and breathing. The idea that I have made it 21 years is a miracle within itself considering COVID-19, driving, falls, sports, concussions, and all of the other things that could have potentially killed me long long ago.

I am thankful that I am not dead and hope I stay that way. However, I am very aware that this could be the last thing anyone reads from me from a whole host of things that could lead me to a swift demise. As morbid as it is, it is a truth that we all must face at one point or another. It’s the paradox of life: we all die.

I did say something to my step-dad that I, myself, found rather interesting after having said it. I told him that the one thing that gives me comfort in my own death is that I know that there would be a lot of people at my funeral. It’s true. There would be many people that would mourn my loss and in some ways that makes me feel like I am doing something right because the reality is that life is what you make of it.

I want to spend my life doing something that keeps me fulfilled and adds something to society rather than attempt to hinder it. I do not know how long I will care about the advancement of society because everything is pretty shit right now. I’m just kidding, I will always care.

It’s scary that we can all die at any moment but I am gonna enjoy the ride while I still can.

Have a good day and keep on living

Jonathan